It's The Talking Mooooose!!! It's the ultimate system extension for your Macintosh, which brings a member of the long-extinct race of the Talking Mooses to your home! It will come in without you asking for it, and will say something stupid, witty or funny. It's useless. It's weird. It's the Moose!
System Requirements:
The Moose feels at home on a Macintosh or compatible with System 7.1 or higher or any release of the MacOS (including 8.x). It also requires the Apple Speech Synthesis extensions (a.k.a. PlainTalk Text-To-Speech), namely the "Speech Manager" extension and the "Speech" control panel. You should be able to find Apple's Speech Manager on your system disks/CD-ROM or on Apple's Web or FTP site (http://www.apple.com/macos/speech or ftp://ftp.apple.com).
Features:
When the Moose got its new version number (it's much more cuddly than the old number he had and isn't quite as stuffed) he was so happy that he decided to attend High School to learn some more tricks. Part of this is his improved support for exotic foreign languages such as AppleScript, and a course in masquerading techniques, called "Plug-in animations for Uli's Moose". Since he attended the "Learn to learn" class with Mr. Werner, he now also knows how to memorize your custom phrases much quicker (just remember: "Plug-in Phrases").
Besides this, he has become much more observant, and he will again notice when some things happen around it, such as applications that start up or windows that are collapsed.
Finally, the Moose is a much more trusting fellow after all the nice e-mails it got from all his new friends, and if you tell him to be very silent when some application is up, he will cooperate graciously.
Finally, if you ask very nicely (or press a pre-defined keyboard combination), the moose will now even repeat the last phrase he said.
He has also learned that making a joke too often gains not as much respect and will now try to use even his favorite punch lines only once per session.
How do I install the Moose?
Uli's Moose 2.0.5 finally has an installation program. Simply double-click the "Uli's Moose Installer" icon to start it. It offers to install the "Uli's Moose" extension, control panel and the "Moose" folder with all the phrases and animations in it, or either one of them (though this is only of use if you accidentally deleted something). The files will be installed on your current system disk.
Note that the installer will quit any older version of the Talking Moose that is currently running before installing, which means you have to restart your Macintosh after the installation or use one of the provided AppleScript applets to start the Moose again.
If, for some reason, the installer doesn't work for you, you can find instructions on manual installation farther down this document.
Tricks:
The moose will always try to speak using the same voice as you have specified in the "Speech" control panel, but will keep its current voice until it is re-started. To move the moose around on the screen, click at him with the command key pressed (else he'll be offended and shut up) and drag him where you want him to be. Since the moose uses your Mac's speakers, it might also be a good idea to adjust the "Sound Output" volume in your "Monitors and Sound" control panel. Your ears won't fall off if you decrease the Beep volume.
How to manually install the Moose:
All items you need to install are in the "Installer Files" folder. Drop the "Uli's Moose" extension onto your system folder's icon. The Finder will prompt you that it needs to reside in the "Extensions" folder. Approve of that. Then take the "Moose" folder that was next to the Moose extension and put it directly into your system folder. Finally, put the "Moose Panel" application anywhere you find it comfortable, I usually drop it into the system folder's "Control Panels" folder. Restart. The Talking Moose will say “Hello” to you. Be sure to say “Hello” back to the Moose. Until the Moose gets to know you better it is a wise idea to be as polite as possible to him. Offended Mooses sometimes give off a strong musky odor, which is to be avoided at all costs!
Installation Graphic for impatient users:
The Oscar Speech:
• There are many people I'd like to thank, like the many people who keep me reading e-mails until 4:00 AM by sending in bug reports and "thank you" notes, the folks who offer to help me track down the bugs they have discovered. The ones who accidentally (and unknowingly) provide the bug fixes for me (Hi Mr. Martellaro) etc. A big "Thanks" and my best wishes to you all!
• More thanks to the people who supplied me with new and old Phrases: Bill Goodman, Jay E. Lichtenauer, Paul Minczer. And a hearty "Moof" to Clarus (you all know who) and Cédrik Lime as well as to Chuck Sherman and his international conglomerate.
• Also a big "thank you" to the author of the Phraseology Phrase editor, Jay Lichtenauer, who took all the phrase stuff off my back.
• Another big "thanks" goes to Steve Halls, the author of the original Talking Moose who had the idea for this extension and kindly donated the graphics and researched the Moose history.
• Also, thanks to John Penner for sending me the longest list of feature requests I have ever seen. See, I'm really listening :-)
The Moose is free and will remain like that!
Since I believe the Talking Moose is one of those unique features which make the Macintosh just what it is, not just a computer or a tool (although it is a computer and that is, in turn, a tool), but a lifestyle, a product which has its own personality, just like the original VW Beetle had it, or the new Mercedes A-Class, I have decided to keep this a free product. Luckily Steve, the owner of the rights to the moose, sees it the same way and that means it stays this way. This includes my promise that if I should ever become unable to maintain the Moose, and neither Steve Halls nor me myself and I can find someone to carry on this project, that I'll release the sources to this program into the public domain (this doesn't include the graphics and the name, though, I don't own them!).
Contacting the author:
The author of Uli's Moose is M. Uli Kusterer. You can reach him at the following places:
Internet: witness@weblayout.com
URL: http://www.weblayout.com/witness
Legalese:
Although Uli's Moose is distributed at no cost, it is copyrighted software and not in the public domain. The code, documentation and graphics are the mental property of M. Uli Kusterer and/or Steve Halls and may not be used elsewhere without prior explicit permission by their creator(s). Uli's Moose is provided "as is" and no warranty whatsoever is made for the fitness for any particular purpose. Also, no one involved in the creation of Uli's Moose may be held responsible for any damage caused by the use or mis-use of this product, use at your own risk. Using this software in any country where the above disclaimer or part of it is illegal constitutes an illegal export/import on the user's part.
You may freely give Uli's Moose to anyone provided you do not charge anything beyond the cost of the medium it is transferred on. Including Uli's Moose in any commercial distributions or software compilations requires the prior explicit consent of the creator(s).
